


The Dog's Pyjamas

by kageygirl



Category: Kingsman (Movies)
Genre: Fluff and Humor, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-07
Updated: 2018-03-07
Packaged: 2019-03-28 07:45:01
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 528
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13899510
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kageygirl/pseuds/kageygirl
Summary: Some sartorial sins are too heinous to endure.  Eggsy might have finally found Harry's breaking point.





	The Dog's Pyjamas

**Author's Note:**

> [LelithSugar](https://archiveofourown.org/users/LelithSugar/pseuds/LelithSugar) sent me [here](http://metro.co.uk/2018/02/27/can-now-get-pyjamas-pets-face-7333822/) and I said, oh nooooooo, and she said, write it write it write it, and I am easy.

Harry freezes in the bedroom doorway, with the kind of wary stillness he usually reserves for armed nuclear weapons or American tour groups. "What on earth have you done?"

Looking up from doing up his last button, Eggsy gives the collar of his brand-new pyjamas a quick pet, right over one of the several dozen prints of JB's squashy little face. "You like 'em?"

Harry makes his way closer, slowly, the horrified lines on his face deepening with each step he takes. "They're abominable. I won't have those in this house."

Eggsy lounges back on the bed, arms folded behind his head and legs crossed at the ankles. "Guess you'll have to take 'em off me, then," he says, raising his chin and fixing Harry with an even look.

Harry starts to reach for him, then stops, looking conflicted.

Eggsy pushes himself up on his elbows. "What's the matter?"

"They're so garish I hardly want to touch them," Harry says, his mouth twitching. "I would say congratulations are in order, but finding clothing I'd rather not peel you out of is not behavior that I wish to encourage."

Eggsy can't help it -- he starts laughing helplessly, dropping his head back. "You are such a dramatic _wanker_ , Harry. How am I possibly in love with you?"

"That's nearly as much a mystery as how I could love someone with such ghastly taste in clothing," Harry says. He braces a hand on the mattress and leans in to kiss Eggsy; Harry's so good at it that it takes a long, indulgent moment for Eggsy to realize that Harry is _still not touching his pyjamas_.

"Y'know, that's pretty rich, coming from a man who decorates with taxidermy," Eggsy says. He lets himself sink back down, so that Harry will have a harder time reaching him without giving in, but as Harry is a stubborn bastard with excellent balance, it doesn't really work.

"That's different," Harry says, nipping at his jaw, and Eggsy lifts his chin almost without thinking about it, letting Harry have access to his neck. At Eggsy's inquisitive hum, he murmurs against his pulse point, "I _like_ the taxidermy."

Eggsy laughs, a bit breathless with Harry's mouth on him. "I'm willing to bet you like me more than you hate my clothes," he says, and snakes his hands around Harry's hips to roll them both over, pinning Harry beneath him with his weight.

Harry's face is absolutely classic, like a cat that's been dunked in a bath against its will. "Marginally," he drawls, but his hands slide up beneath Eggsy's pyjama top, palms pressing warm against his lower back.

Eggsy lets Harry draw him down, lets himself enjoy a lazy kiss or two or five, until a thought occurs and he pulls back. "Taxidermy," he breathes, and Harry blinks at him. "Harry, we could get you a pair with Mr. Pickle on them!"

"Oh Christ, you _would_ ," Harry groans, covering his eyes with one hand. Eggsy doesn't stop giggling until Harry shoves him over and mercilessly goes down on him, and while he keeps Eggsy under a forbidding glare, Eggsy still catches the corners of his mouth turning up.


End file.
